First date ideas for over 60s

The best first date over 60 is short, in daylight, somewhere public, and built around something to look at or do so the conversation never has to carry the whole hour. Coffee and cake, a garden visit, a gallery or a riverside walk all work well. Make your own way there, tell a friend where you are going, and keep the second date for something longer.

What makes a good first date at this age

After 60, most people have stopped wanting to impress and started wanting to enjoy themselves. A good first meeting respects that. It is easy to reach by bus or car, has somewhere to sit, has toilets nearby, and does not involve shouting over music. It should also be easy to end politely after an hour if it is not working, and easy to extend if it is.

Fifteen first date ideas

Over a cup of tea

• Coffee and cake at an independent café, mid-morning when it is quiet.
• Afternoon tea at a hotel or tea room, if you both like a sense of occasion.
• A garden centre café, which sounds unromantic and is in fact one of the easiest places to talk.

Something to look at

• A museum or art gallery. Many in the UK are free, and the exhibits give you something to talk about.
• A stately home or National Trust garden, with a tea room at the end.
• A botanic garden or arboretum in any season.
• A local history walk or talk, if you are both curious about where you live.

Something to do

• A gentle walk by a river, canal or seafront, with a bench and a café on the route.
• A matinee at the cinema or theatre, followed by a drink to talk about it.
• A lunchtime concert in a church or concert hall.
• A farmers' market on a Saturday morning.
• A round of crazy golf or a game of bowls, if you both like a bit of competition.

For the second or third date

• Lunch at a country pub.
• A day trip by train to a nearby town.
• A cookery or craft class for two.

Arranging it safely

Before you meet, have a phone or video call, so you know the person matches their photos. Choose the place yourself or agree on somewhere you know. Travel independently, tell a friend or relative where you will be and when you expect to be home, and keep your phone charged. Never lend money or share bank details, however the conversation goes. Our safety page lists the warning signs to look out for.

What to talk about

The things on your profiles are the easy start: a holiday, a grandchild, a book, a garden. Ask questions and listen to the answers. It is fine to mention a late husband or wife, or a divorce, but a first date is not the moment for the whole story. Our profile tips for over 60s help you give people something to ask about.

Where to find someone to go with

If you have not yet met anyone to take for coffee, our guide to where singles over 60 meet and the page on over 60s dating near me are good places to start. If a companion for days out is what you are after, see friendship over 60.